Eh! José!

Have you ever had one of those random conversations with a stranger while waiting for the bus or standing at the checkout line at the grocery store? I have, and to be honest, I don’t like them very much. They’re just awkward and I never really know what to say, so I’ll do anything to avoid having to listen to that old lady behind me. Because they’re almost always old ladies.

So you can imagine that when an elderly woman asked me to sit down with her during lunch a few weeks ago, I wasn’t very thrilled. But seeing that there weren’t any other seats available, I thanked her and sat down at her table.

I learned quite a few things during my lunch with Thérèse. She’s retired, she worked as a waitress her whole life, she lives alone in a small but comfy apartment, she enjoys having her coffee at McDonald’s everyday, and she likes watching reality TV shows where participants get paired up in the hope that they’ll find their other half.

“They should do one of those shows for people my age,” she told me.

But the most important thing I learned was the reason why old ladies tend to have conversations with random people like me: they are just lonely.

Like Thérèse, there are more than four million Canadians over the age of 65, and with baby boomers soon to hit the 65-year-old mark, that number will double by 2026.
Although some Canadian seniors try to keep themselves busy by joining volunteer groups or organizations, there is no doubt that many of them live a pretty lonely life. Take Thérèse for example, who spends most of her day watching TV and only dares to go out as far as her local McDonald’s for fear that something will happen to her while she walks alone on the street, or the elderly man in my neighbourhood whose hobby consists of taking the bus back and forth all day long.

Should it then come as a surprise that the percentage of seniors aged 65 to 74 using the Internet more than doubled between 2000 and 2003? Twenty-eight per cent of them are now Internet users, and those aged 75 and up are also catching up on their mouse use. Perhaps the Internet helps them feel a little more connected to the world that seems to have forgotten them.

Maybe if we weren’t so focused on our own lives we would realize that there’s people like Thérèse out there that need some of our time and care. Why is it that we think it’s ok to simply abandon our parents at a retirement home or a small apartment? Are we too busy to take care of them like they took care of us when we were kids?

Granted some seniors still like their privacy and will insist on living on their own while they are still capable of doing so, but that is no excuse for not visiting them, taking them out for lunch, or simply calling them so they have someone to talk to.

Being lonely and having nothing to do aren’t exactly the greatest things in life, and senior citizens could use some of our company. So what can we do? You might have parents or grandparents you might consider seeing more often, or you might want to start volunteering at a retirement home. But most importantly, when the old lady waiting in line behind you starts talking, listen to her. I know next time I will.